There are people who keep Chalav Yisroel, but not for equipment. That being said, I doubt many of them would truly trust dairy food made in a non-chalav-Yisroel kitchen. The equipment wouldn’t be the only problem, but rather to kitchen owner’s knowledge of accommodating that need.
I think the original post is on target. I don’t like that the thread has been called disturbing. In a lot of communities, I think the range of Kashrus is wider than it should be (sometimes extending outside of the halachah). You don’t want to make someone feel like they’re in the halachic dilemma of choosing between eating something they don’t trust, embarrassing you, or even making you angry.