BS”D
Still amounts to misuse of his uniform LOL and I would love to live in a place where the cops would do that. Wait a minute, I DO! Here and everywhere in the FSU, we have the best cops money can buy, but their fees are going up lately!
As for the blood donation and minyan, because of my white fur and 600 kilo weight, I get counted as four or five in any minyan and tend to stand wherever I want. (Fortunately I am not noheg to sit during any part of the davening). Blood, well, they take over three quarts from me at a time but the amount of 192 proof alcohol in my blood as well as my unique blood type means that the blood can only be used to anesthetize large ursines in the zoo.
Anyone who believes me can contact me for a shidduch, but you have to prepay $2000 and four hundred pounds of salmon (a week’s worth of meals) just to be considered for my shadchonis…or is it badchonis?