147 – good points. I would just add though, that Kibud Av v’aim and money are not the only issues here. It’s the emotional and relationship issues that would concern me the most:
1. How will this affect your relationship with your parents? What can you do to make sure that it doesn’t have a negative affect? What should you say to them?
2. How will going against your parents affect you emotionally (even if technically kibud av v’eim doesn’t apply in this case)? What can you do to make sure that it doesn’t affect you negatively?
3. How difficult will it be too get married without your parents’ emotional support? How can you find a way to manage? Do you have another support system in place before you get married? Marriage is hard. Shana Rishona is hard. You need to have some kind of support system in place BEFORE you get married.
4. Are you really ready to get married? If you have some kind of mentor, they might be able to help you answer that question.
5. Is there someone who can give you advice before or during the dating process?
Bottom line, as I wrote above and as 147 wrote, you may need some kind of Rav/Rebbetzin/mentor before you start dating.