To BigGolem:
lightbrite said to BigGolem:
“Whichever type of gift, I like how ->YOU<- thought of a way to build that connection.”
That MIGHT mean “ask the mods for my e-mail address, and let’s get to know each other.” It can’t hurt to try.
The other thing she said is that notes, gifts, etc. from relationships that didn’t work out “haunt her”. That means stick to flowers or food which she will eventually throw out. Meanwhile pay attention to (and comment on) her jewelry (or lack thereof) in case the relationship gets serious. 75% of communication is non-verbal. Women use clothes to communicate, and you can give her the gift she is looking for when she says she wants to be “listened to”. Unfortunately what she is hearing is “How about some notes that will haunt you for the rest of your life if this doesn’t work out?”
The problem with this whole discussion is that there are many different types of relationships just like there are many different types of people. G-d willing you’ll get married soon and understand why married people hesitate to make generalizations.
(I wouldn’t have pointed this out if you hadn’t call yourself “BigGolem”. That name communicates: “Please help me”.)
Get going and good luck.