I know I said that I would not return to the coffee room, and I still stand by that. However I was alerted to this post by a friend who asked me to raise a point and an issue that he has been having, and I would like to know what all of you have to say about it. is it possible that we are all to blame? can it be that both men and women going out are too superficial ? there are ample examples being brought up of boys being picky over girls looks , but my friend for instance is 21 years old, tall, an extremely nice person, who cannot get a date because he has an up hat. does that make sense? and it is the girls who are bothered by it , not the mothers. What do you think, is that a valid worry, when the bochur is one of the nicest, smartest boys in yeshiva, when he wears that type of hat just because he has been wearing it all his life (and no he is not chasidish) is that a reason to reject him?
I will now once again leave, and come back periodically over the next few days to see if anyone replied thanks