Trying to hang on, I second all the other posts here. I think it’s great that you are trying to hang on, and actively looking for help and advice. That’s really amazing!
It’s not easy being a teen today (or in any day) and I wish you a lot of hatzlacha with your struggles.
I do agree with the others that this is not the best place for advice, but I realize that you are probably having a hard time finding someone to talk to, and that’s why you came here.
There is a hotline in Lakewood for teenagers. It is called Regesh and the number is 732-367-7700. They have a website that might be worth looking at. I think that calling the hotline would be a great place to start. They could probably help you or guide you towards someone who could help.
I am also thinking that you might like the “The Thinking Jewish Teenagers Guide to Life” by Rabbi Akiva Tatz. I read it a really long time ago, so I don’t remember that much about it, but I remember that I liked it. As far as I recall, I think it gives good basic clear reasons for being Frum.