“Can you name a situation where spanking is necessary and there are no ways around it? So far, no one has been able to. “
SJS, yes we have. A small child runs into the street. That is a potch moment in my book. You cannot reason with a child 18 months old, or with an older toddler who doesn’t comprehend the concept of safety. My granddaughter DOES understand, and she has never been potched, B”H. She is not a perfect little angel ALL the time, but she can be reasoned with, and she knows that NOT SAFE means something that will cause a big booboo on her. We have taught her concepts that she understands well, but it helps that she is kinehora a mature child. Many bright children are still not so mature, and they do not necessarily obey. In a dangerous situation, potch first saying NO in a firm voice and ask questions later. They will remember that potch, believe me. And it will not scar their little psyches, I promis you. We are talking about a potch on the rear or hand, not a beating. Timeout only work with children who will obey the timeout rule. And yes, my little angel has had a few timeouts, but much fewer lately.
I admire your resolve to try to impart these rules with love and without resorting to corporal means. But sometimes it is the only thing that works, and a parent does not totally close off that unpleasant option if it can help. And you DO know when it is necessary.