Reply To: Going off the Derech

gavra at work-so far, every gesture I made was rejected. I keep trying different things, hoping something will click. But he is getting revengeful, trying to get the other kids to go against us. I am really controling myself. I never thought I could get to the point of getting angry, but this Shabbos he was so difficult, that if he doesn’t change his language/behavior soon, I’ll have to consider other living options. (I can’t believe I said that). So far, love is not conquering anything..

Pirate-it’s a great idea, but I could never get him to agree. I’m hoping he will to go to a counselor, and am trying to think of ways to ‘convince’ him to go. Any suggestions?

BRAINFREEZE_ I never said ‘family’ doctors, re-read my post. And although psychiatrists are the ones to treat bipolar, psychologists and social workers are also quite familiar with this illness and know how to diagnose it, although they typically defer to the psychiatrist. I don’t know why you continue to suggest that my son is bipolar. According to the DSM IV, he is not bipolar! In case you are not familiar with the DSM IV, it is the diagnostic manual psychiatrists and mental health professionals use to diagnose bipolar, and every other mental illness. Thanks again for being so concerned..

MO Chossid-mechila given. Sometimes, a person can say or do all the right things, accept advice and good suggestions, and still meet without success. I’ve learned this from this horrible situation with my son. I’m not saying I am a perfect parent by any means. I am only perfectly imperfect! But the more I spoke to my son over the past few months since this got started, the more I see that he is on a path to destruction, where love and good sense cannot reach him. The way things are now, I can’t imagine how we will get to Elul. Each day is gehennom. Pray for us..

mom12-probably he will go out anyway, but maybe he’ll come home a little earlier? Not sure. But the idea is not to let him perpetuate a lazy lifestyle. My son was home the whole Shabbos bc of what happened between my husband and my son’s chevra. Not sure if he did the right thing by confronting them, bc it embarrased my son. My husband thinks he was right bc it kept them away from eachother. But for how long? Anyway, my son was angry the whole Shabbos, and it really wasn’t pleasant. My son’s Rebbe called and spoke to my son. He wants to meet him tomorrow, let’s see what happens..