WOW- I disagree about him never returning to black and white. You never know where life can lead him. However the reality is, and You may not want to hear this, but i highly doubt your son will ever want to be a part of your community based on the way you portray his being treated there. However thats not a bad thing. There are many many religious communities where he may fit in very well once he grows up. (which most likely will happen- theres no reason to belive hel be a lazy 16 year old his whole life). He doesnt need to learn to fit into the box, the box has to bend if it wants to fit around him.
Also if you dont mind me asking. do you live in israel or the united states or somewhere else because an OTD kid from israel is way different then the kids from america.