The main problem a lot of people have with Kollel vs army service is not that people learn all day and don’t serve. It’s that a system has been created where serving is Assur and learning all day is mandatory.
I lived in Charedi society in Israel for many years, and even though not all soldiers are attacked and abused by all segments of Charedi society, there is a strong stigma and they are looked down upon.
Yair Lapid was guilty of bad choice of words when he used the phrase ‘sharing the burden’ implying army service was a burden and Kollel was not.
However, it is still true that those who do not wish to learn all day and want to serve should be allowed to do so. People talk so much about how terrible the IDF is for religious boys, but in my personal experience, far more people I know went OTD by hanging around outside the Mir during Seder because they couldn’t be bothered learning but the system they went through forced them too, then people serving in religious units.