Sparkly. Seems like you realy would want to do better. True it’s hard to stop doing things that give you pleasure especialy as you said you are depressed these pleasures might be an outlet for you like watching t.v. talking to guys etc. I think if you would find a frum counselor to listen and guide you might be very beneficial for you. You might be surprised what difference it can make. No you are not sick or crazy for doing that. I beleive it’s a mature decision for any one to do .
I also beleive you are far from looking forward to college next week and that can have a strong impact on you. Please don’t take anything personal,I might be wrong . Its just my assumption.