Person1:”But honestly what bothered me Joseph is that you made it ilegitemate to turn down a guy for a very legitemate reason.”
Even though I disagreed with Joseph’s statement l’maaseh, I would have to disagree with your statement as well. I wouldn’t say it’s a “very legitimate reason”. I think that Joseph was just pointing out that it is relatively unimportant, which is true. On the other hand, it is something that is important to some people, and that is legitimate.
On the one hand, we have a story about the Netziv giving mussar to his nephew for addressing an envelope incorrectly, and a story of another Gadol (maybe Rav Avraham Pam) giving mussar to his (grandson?) for his incorrect english. On the other hand, there is a famous story of a girl turning down a guy because he didn’t know how to drink coffee correctly and he drank it in a really weird way (I forget the details – maybe he ate the coffee beans and then drank the milk or something like that) and years later when her father found out that the guy ended up becoming a tremendous Talmid Chacham, he fainted.