DY and Joseph: In abstract I agree with you. Lema’aseh, though, the facts on the ground are that there are teenagers and young adults who, for whatever societal reasons, view their “identity” as an integral part of who they are and many suffer from extreme depression and other issues because of it. So I think it was more proper and the world was better when such ideas were “in the closet”. Now that they’re not, though, I do think we have to support those people that struggle with this.
By the way, they wouldn’t need to be involved at all. People don’t need to be “out” to know that we support, in abstract, the struggle they go through. Someone doesn’t need to tell me he’s gay for him to know that the Frum community thinks that him becoming not Frum is a bad thing.