Kasha,
Great. If that’s what works for your marriage, then all the more power to you. If your wife is willing to stand around and wait on you hand and foot all day, then fine — it’s her (and your) life (lives). If your wife is willing to lay down and let you “pull rank” on major decisions, then great — it works for you.
But just because it works for you doesn’t mean that it works for everyone. I’ve found that, in my household, working things out through discussion and compromise — and with no one “pulling rank” works for us.
Yes, I know that you believe that that’s not how the Torah wants families run. But I can’t believe that the Torah wants me to run roughshod over my wife’s wishes (against my will too) when making major life decisions. I don’t believe for a moment that that’s what the Torah wants and I will not do it.
The Wolf