jphone,
By “training” Pashuteh Yid probably means training the housekeeper in how the house is organized, what tasks are expected, and to what standards the work is to be done. Cleaning a toilet requires minimal training, but folding & putting away laundry requires more.
It seems that those who don’t use cleaning help have some difficulty understanding how dependent people can become on this help, especially when someone’s had the same housekeeper working for her for some time.
To the OP: I hope you will find a better housekeeper soon; it may then be easier for you to resume a relationship with your former friend.