Tzippi, Ames,:
There is absolutely no question that age alone isn’t a reason to date. People need to be compatible. What we are discusing is that age (within reason) should not be a reason NOT to date. To the contrary boys and their parents should look in the very large pool of girls their own age for a girl with whom they think they can build a bayis neeamn.
Clearly the reason for the crisis is the inequity of numbers that is a direct result of the age gap. In the last year and a half there seems to have been so many more close in age shidduchim as a result of the awarenss that has been created.
As for ames contention that girls will not respect their husbands. Clearly it depends on the individual. There are plenty of 24 yr old boys who would earn the respect of plenty of 22-23 year old girls. Do you really think that every 23 year old needs to marry a 19 year old to have a good marriage? Is their any evidence that close in age shidduchim create shaolom bayis prolems?