Wow! I was not expecting the outpouring of responses here. That being the case, I am not going to address each person/idea individually; I will simply discuss each question in light of the answers given:
1) The consensus here seems to be that merely defeating Malfoy is enough to gain the allegiance of the elder wand. This does not resonate with me for two reasons: Disarming him of a different wand is hardly “defeating” him, and this also must assume that no one had disarmed Malfoy in the many-months-long interim.
2) The only suggestion given was ruba k’kulah which I don’t get.
3) We seem to agree that there might be some chiluk.
4) There were a bunch of suggestions but I don’t think any of them really addressed the question. I was not suggesting that Harry shouldn’t have been involved; he should have been able to get help (from a minimal amount of people).
5) I don’t think anyone adequately addressed this one.
Perhaps tomorrow I will discuss the questions that others have posed and maybe add a couple more myself.