Most divorces can be avoided if the parties would apologize prior to going to sleep. Many of us when we say kriyas shemah forgive those who have sinned against us, which is more or less the same thing. By the time they go to a professional the hatred has spiraled out of hand, each party knows what to do to antagonize the other and divorce is the only option. It’s like an addiction as soon as they get together they fight.
I know a timid guy wouldn’t hurt a fly or talk back to anyone who got married to a woman, the next thing I hear they are adopting her niece. Within a year they were divorced, but since he adopted the wife’s niece he was stuck with child support. This guy was close with R’ Miller who was strongly against divorces and probably spoke to him prior to getting divorced.
From a financial standpoint they are better off remaining together as child support and alimony plus the cost of maintaining two home will drain their assets. Does a wife who is supporting her husband and divorces him have to pay alimony?
From an emotional standpoint they maybe better off getting divorced. The stress of fighting will result in health problem besides psychological problems for years to come.
As far as who is at fault each case must be decided on it’s own merits, but many divorces could have been resolved if they would both apologize when their fight just started. It’s like the Hatfield & the McCoy who had a feud and even though no one can remember what it was about they were still killing each other.