I hate the term “resume.” I hate the term “research.” I hate the term “lists.” Our unmarried children are not filling out a job application. I am not writing a term paper. Our kids are not an item amomng many listed items to be picked up, or things to do.
The entire shidduch process as it exists today, offends me heartily. In my humble opinion, the so-called rules of the game are why we have a shidduch crisis today. Shidduchim should be suggested to the young man and young woman in question, by any and all people, professional shadchanim or not, who know them or know of them. If the young people are too immature, to unintelligent, too busy to be bothered with speaking to people about a proposed shidduch on their own, without Mommy making their decisions for them, they are not ready to be dating, much less get married. I know of thirty-five year old guys whose mothers are still making those decisions regarding to whom their sons will be redt. That is utterly ridiculous, and bodes not-so-well for the kallah who agrees to marry such a passive Mama’s boy.
BTW, the term spinster has a pejorative connotation. No one thinks ill of a bachelor, but call a woman a spinster and you have nothing good to say about her. Not fair, and not very nice.