In my own, personal, clearly biased observations, I’ve met married people with all sorts of abhorrent traits – physical, intellectual, ethical, behavioral, etc. So, there’s no set of traits that assures success or failure in the shidduch game.
In the end, shidduchim – and many things in life for that matter – is about salesmanship. If the product isn’t selling, then improve the product or find less discriminating customers.
Yes, it sounds crass and perhaps it is, but hiding one’s head in the sand and howling at the moon isn’t going to solve anything.
Either stop obsessing about how the world *ought* to be and deal with the world as it is or learn to live without the things you seek.