cij – i apologize because i am answering without even reading your post. I got to, “But let’s say you were a single girl, and you signed a contract not to get engaged until the year was over. “
i never said, implied, or hinted to such a statement.it’s both a ridiculous statement, and insulting to think i would say that. if the rest of the answer is based on that premise than please reread the posts.
i stopped reading the thread because there was alot of that reflexive – “take what you think you heard and disagree”, or “assume the chareidi lifestyle is being attacked so jump all over it” attitude. i reopened it now cuz i saw you name 🙂 but it seems to have gotten so convoluted that asking people to respect their commitments to children has turned into a defense of an imagined attack on the shidduch system.
whatever.