Wanting to be seen in a positive light by others is a very human trait. The fact that that translates into having wives who are beauties (physically) is something we can all blame ourselves for, as a society.
Maybe we should put more obvious emphasis on the right things.
Now, it goes without saying that doing things just because of what others think, or trying to get others to look is a terrible thing. (Even if it’s a human tendency.) And yes, bnai Torah should be most aware of that and they should be the last ones marrying, or doing anything else for that reason.
Bottom line: we are all works in progress.