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Both of my parents died recently; my father at the end of 2012 and my mother in the fall last year. My father, among other things, had congestive heart failure. My mother had pancreatic cancer. Each of them had a signed DNR (Do Not Resuscitate order), which they had prepared many years before they each became ill. My father was about to enter a hospice service, but he died before my sister could get him enrolled. My mother was on a hospice service for the two weeks before she died.
My mother had food available to her until the time she became comatose, but it didn’t matter – she wasn’t eating anyway. She drank until the time she became comatose. After she was on hospice, she had no further fluid intake by mouth (she was in a coma) or by IV. Both the doctor and her hospice nurse explained to us that her body was shutting down; any attempt to give her fluids of any sort would simply end up drowning her internally.
She wasn’t dehydrating, she was dying of cancer. She went painlessly, B”H, with her children with her. Both the nursing home staff and the hospice personnel treated her with great dignity and respect during her last weeks.