popa- I have one response.
You are right. and you are wrong. It isn’t the way it is. It doesn’t have to be the way it is. That’s my point to all my posts. Life is not black and white. We have the Torah and Hashem and thats about where it stops being so clear cut. Its clear that life isn’t supposed to be so simple- look at all the machlokes that occurs in the gemara. look at how our Gedolim are working around modern day challenges, dealing with raw Halacha and seeing how it fits.
I am not the way it is. I go to secular collage, with many bais yaakov girls (believe it or not) and I spoke with them and they told me that the system did not prepare them for university, but that their parents simply could not afford to support them, and they wanted them to go to unviersity. BH we have a good group, lots of shiurim and ways to connect back to homebase (as well we don’t live on campus).
But seriously, how do we stay frum?
Opposite to your beliefs, we don’t let what they say penetrate our being- why? Because thats who we are. We are Baruch Hashem strong in our convictions and connection to Hashem, Torah and Halacha. We can be put in any enviornment and know how to be ourselves while still respecting the people around us. We learn and study the material, e take the tests and we move on. We get our degree and we go and make a parnassa for our families. Some of us who cannot afford/ parents wont help support our families forever need to do this type of thing.