PBA: Wow, a serious post from you, and one I agree with, no less! Thanks! The only thing I take issue with in your post is that you hope that we can understand that these are only small differences. I disagree with that bit. These are very big differences, but even so, what we have in common is much greater. Your ruchniyus does take a hit by not going to the army, and even more so if you treat the army as an unmitigated evil. Refusing to go, or at least to identify with and support the people who do go, is an act of secession from the Jewish people which trains you and your segment of klal yisrael (this “you” is totally generic, I’ve lived in communities on both sides of the issue) to feel like the rest of the Jewish people is an alien “other.” I can understand if you weigh everything and decide that the best option for your ruchniyus is not to go, but you really are sacrificing something by not going.
That’s just my two cents as someone who lost a lot of sleep when I ran back to America instead of joining machal to serve along with my chavrusa.