It does seem somewhat disturbing that we would be held hostage like that by the actions of outsiders.
There’s a lot of precedent for that. On can argue that the whole issur of “chukas hagoyim” is being held “hostage” by the actions of outsiders.
The Chasam Sofer made takanos to separate us from reform, e.g. not having a chupah in a Bais Haknesses (I think that was the C’S).
I would argue that Chabad’s messianism has taken others’ yearning for Moshiach hostage, and modern day zionism has taken non-zionists’ love for E.Y. hostage, and I’m sure we can find other examples.