Families who are not a part of the kollel system end up supporting kollel families in many ways other than just making a donation to kollel itself. These families might give their maaser money to Tomchei Shabbos, which in turn distributes food to hungry kollel families, or they might donate to the local day school or yeshiva ketana to pay tuition for the children of men who learn in kollel.
One thing that troubles me is the way that already strained financial resources cycle through a community without gathering much in the way of dollars from outside the community. I might babysit for my neighbor’s children and use that money to get my shaitel washed and set, and the sheitel macher might use that money at the seforim store, and the owner of the store might go to lunch at the new kosher place in town…At least, it definitely seems to work that way in my community. There are too many men in kollel who aren’t working at all, and there are too many people (mostly women) who have set up little in-home businesses babysitting, or selling tichels or whatnot, but they can never make a real substantial profit because their customers are all frum, and all equally pinched for money. In my case with the babysitting, I’d really like to charge a lot more per hour than I’m getting, but if I raised my rates I wouldn’t get any business. I get it; he’s in kollel and she’s a teacher, and they have to pay rent. But since they send their kids to me, they end up paying my rent, too– and neither they nor we are quite making it.