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Rav Moshe (Iggerot Moshe Even HaEzer 4:14) says that if a BT does not have the characteristic bad middot of a ben nidda we can assume that his mother was tahora b’diavad (e..g. if she went swimming before he was conceived). The Steipler Gaon (Likutim 2:23) writes a similar responsa on the matter, stating that if the BT is crowned with good Midos, he is obviously from the minority of bnei nidda who have good middot.
The Steipler goes further and questions whether the statement of the Gemara means that the child of a niddah will himself have bad middot, or that the blemish of being a ben niddah will possibly affect future generations as well. According to the latter approach, even if the ben niddah has good middot perhaps one should distance one’s self from him.
The Steipler concludes, however, that even if the blemish remains in future generations (a point which is not at all clear in the first place), there is no reason to stay away from a ben niddah. The reason for this is because who can be certain that none of his ancestors, back to the generation that left Egypt, were bnei niddah. Even if they weren’t, Chazal list ben nidah as only one of nine bad middot that produce offspring with bad middot.Among the others on the list are the children produced by unions where the mother is afraid of the father, or quarreling with the father, or the father is drunk, etc. As these are common occurrences among families that are not bnei Tora, there are probably a very low percentage of families that carry no blemish at all. Thus, there is no reason to distance one’s self from a ben niddah.
Having said that, there is something to the claim that a BT will more likely have common ground with another BT. Howeevr, I heard htat a BT is someone who is at the beginner’s stage. The natural progression is for him to become over time as if he is an FFB. On the other hand, an FFB might also be a BT, either because he went OTD or because he became significantly more observant than his parents.
As for rabbanim seeking shidduchim for his children exclusively with families of other rabbanim, this is by far not a universal practice.In the case of a son who also plans to go into the rabbanut it might be preferable because the daughter of a rav knows the benefits and drawbacks (such as shul politics). Similarly, a daughter of a rav might admirte her father’s work and want a similar husband. On the other hand, she might want someone who does not have to deal with the problems a rav faces.