DaasYochid – Until the hospital closes and no one gets helped. That is what seems to happen in NYC quite often (LICH, St. Vincents to name a couple recently). It certainly helps to have government backing, but that is not the case for tuition. I can get into a whole discussion/rant regarding COBRA and how Reagan exploded hospital costs in an upward spiral, but that would really be hijacking the thread.
As per your point, when “they” are told that this is pikuach nefashos, those who are doing the telling should have the decency to put their money where their mouth is and pay for the child as well. Its very easy to spend yenem’s money.
mythoughts – I wish that I had an answer for you. Perhaps you should try a financial helper type to see where you can cut back. Or maybe try home schooling, even if just for your younger children.
Avram: There are web-based programs that can certainly help teach the material as needed. Even for Jewish subjects (Aleph Beta comes to mind as an example). Yes, it won’t be the best education, but most Jewish education isn’t Eton, and you get what you pay for.