Doesn’t sound like you actually learned in Bais Yaakov. This is simply the battle cry of any anti-Bais Yaakov.
Suprisingly, I agree. A Bais Yaakov (such as BJJ in Israel, or (I would imagine) Bais Yaakov D’Rav Meir in Brooklyn) does not “brainwash”, as in subliminally and continuously direct/presume someone in the direction wanted with statements like “When you marry a Kollel Man…..”. That is left to the Sems.